i just wish he would text me so i could ignore his text and show him how little i care anymore
I realize that when i start making 24-themed music videos in my head to the song 'love is a battlefield' that i really need to get out more
the not having weed thing wouldnt be nearly as tragic if it wasnt the one holiday where they launch bright flaming things into the air
I'm playing wingman, but I want to pull a Goose and die.
the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
I just opened a gallon of milk that is good through the 10th of January- I hope I can say the same for myself.
i am about to cut my stepbrother's hair into a mohawk with the same clippers i use to trim my pubes. god is so on my side today.
No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
Don't know how I even got in. I pulled my id out and threw it at the bouncer, and he just picked it up, checked it, and let me in.
Also, turning on the light this morning was a 3 step process. Way too hungover.
A bee came out of the shoe box and stung her. Even the insect community doesn't want her in those hideous things.
I think I'm at a stage of my life where I subconsciously purposefully fuck everything up just to see if I can find a way out of it.
every day is bullshit and fuck everyone. That's my motto for the week
I told him he had to put his dick inside of me at approx 1159 to ensure it was birthday sex. i was 19 when he entered me.. came out 20. winning.
Randomize
