i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
She keeps stunt undies in her bag, 2 sizes too small. She leaves them behind so the guy thinks he was luckier than he was...
Bad news. I lost my teeth. Good news. I can still take a guy home sans teeth.
A French guy bit my cheek. Is that sexy there? Also had to threaten to stab the bus driver. I'm not sure I like Europe.
we convincced her parents we were only wasted meanwhile theire faces were morphing into one and i swear there was a reindeer in the background
I just got peed on. This karma circle is starting to get vicious.
I just peed in a flower pot on the veranda while crying and holding a drink
Meeting his dad and brother for the first time at the jail while I'm bailing him out ISN'T exactly how I pictured this relationship going....
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
I believe you would have been proud of me last night.. I was chasin Fireball shots with Jack and Coke. Guess there's a reason they call me Whiskey Woman.
If I woke up in a pillar of smoke I suppose that's a sign right
Hot date tonight for the first time in months and I just cut my dick shaving. PRAY FOR ME.
Just wore the promise ring dad gave me freshman year of high school as a fake wedding band while I bought a pregnancy test. I think it's safe to say that's not what he had in mind with that gift 14 years ago.
Babe, I'm gunna be straight with you. When you act like a dick it makes me regret not fucking my manager last week.
First aid class means get dry humped by moderately attractive college students during heimlich maneuver training.
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