If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
the guy at the pet shop just had an eye seizure while looking at my chest
dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
I called for backup and had two guys carry him to the shower. The bigger guy offered to wash his hair.
i love him because he let me keep my UGGS on while we had sex
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
There will always be a place in my black heart for him because he gave me my first sex-induced orgasm. While you slept on the bunk above.
It all started with sending him a text about Spongebob. It escalated from there.
We duck taped Dave to a rolling chair and shoved him in the bed of the truck then took off for a bit.. We didn't explain it that way when the nurse asked what happened though.
If you ever feel goofy just think of the fact that I just shaved the batman symbol into my pubes
did you just correct my grammar and then send me a photo of your dick?
I just stood beside an Amish man and bought Cocoa Krispies and tampons.
I got a lap dance last night from a girl while I was wearing a Captian America onsie. My life does not suck.
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
Long story short I ended up getting choked out by a really hot guy in the girls bathroom at a bar last night
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