On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
Remember that one time i smeared period blood on your face?
I hate you
he just tried to lick my eyebrow. thats the deal breaker.
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
My patience ran out after you started clapping at the strippers everytime they took off a piece of clothing.
He told me something must be wrong, because no one had seen my boobs yet
Just a heads up, the coffee pot is filled with Jager.
Hahaha I don't remember taking it away. But no one should have a sledgehammer at a party. NO ONE.
I love when groups of boys part so I can walk through. It's like a red sea of penises, and I am their Moses.
Dude get here. I just re-invented nachos. For real though. They werent real before right now
Had a dream I went to Disney to visit you and then I got really drunk and puked all over these little kids in line
this new dose of ADD meds is totally being waisted with the unemployed new graduate thing if only I could add my hyper focused side effects to a coverletter
You came in, yelled 'i am from the future' then puked all over the floor
i woke up on the floor in front of the fireplace and my last google search was "fuck sponges"
Randomize