i was just singing like a virgin out loud my mom told me to stop kidding myself
Lesbian chick is doing her presentation on the time she woke up on the dockside still drunk at 7 am. This is why I show up to chinese class.
oh, you know. just sitting in my bed high as fuck wearing a windbreaker and watching british tv.
Just found the cutest bag of coke under my bed. I'm going to get fucked up and bleach the cat vomit out of my sheets.
Drunk cheerio confetti may seem like a brilliant idea when your drunk, but believe me, the next day, its a horrible, horrible mess.
We laughed. We cried. We came everywhere.
Judging by his bulge. This guy is going home with me. Who doesn't want a dick that looks like it used to be a pillar in Rome.
I told him he could fuck me in his Notre Dame jersey if they won and he never texted back. What is this world coming to
Is there a tactful way to ask "how are your balls?" Or do I just ask point blank
Apparently I was directing traffic outside of Keeneland. Apparently I'm not a police officer. Who knew....
Ahha guy saw me buying beer, went "hmmmmm" and nodded his head approvingly. No words exchanged, but he has made his way to my heart haha
I think I was judged by a squirrel this morning during the walk...
i woke up and couldnt remember who was in my bed and it was so dark.. i rolled over and started kissing him and feeling his face because hey... if the blind can see like that.. maybe i could too
that is very illegal...i love you.
Just do what I do and listen to your vagina. She’ll growl when she smells good dick
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