you wouldn't even come home last night... Dead to me
So she said she wears a diaper when she's on her period and I'm not going to lie, I kind of want to see the diaper.
Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'
I walk in to see her roommate half naked on their stripper pole. I knew I was home.
I just found 17 dollars of saltine crackers in my room. confused incredibly. suprised not at all.
I don't care what he thinks. My vagina has an open door policy.
Pretty sure even her dog was surprised when I got that blow job.
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
There's a good chance a guy sucked off my right earring last night
Well... He is a good looking man underneath all the fat and muff.
He never broke character while fucking me on the neighbor's lawn. I give him a 10 for his dedication to the British accent.
i wore just an American flag as my costume-huge success. 20 people pledged allegiance to my ass including a senior frat boy at the keg. God bless America.
He's going to find out eventually, but really what's he going to do? Cry about it and buy another fucking kitten??
I got high and had sex with reindeer antlers on. It was magical and animalistic. Tia the season.
I mean if you can't appreciate a good looking dick then just get out.
Randomize
