I was to big spoon the shit out of you right now
I'm so hungover and dru,k
This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
I drank it, and now my boss keeps hitting me in the face with beams of light.
Tripping at your desk probably isn't the best plan you've had.
just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
I just puked in the mop bucket at work. I think I need to go home.
I left my Thanksgiving family dinner puking in my hands from the worst hangover in the world
Did we fight the bathroom girl ? She just wanted to give us lotion and condoms.
Well it involved jumping two nine foot fences. But when you mix alcohol and persistence you can't lose.
Let's not refer to him as Dustin. That makes him seek like a real person, not just a dick I would like to experience.
Dude he's not responding... I'll take that as an unpleasant visit to the clinic
In lieu of flowers, please donate to The Hungover Children's Fund in my name.
You told your boyfriend he needed to fuck you in the tree because it would make you guys one with nature.
Did he?
wow bdsm is so cute
I'm gunna wear a purple dress, so if you see someone looking confused and lost wearing purple it's probably me
Randomize
