very cute, but more "I wanna put you in my pocket and keep you as a pet" and less "please bang me" type of cute.
That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
I envy the lives of milf's kids, the little kid grabs her tits and she just laughs and says not now
We're going to play a drinking game. It's called "Senior Year of College."
Our drug dealer just got busted, wear black tmrw
are we at that level where i can tell you your girlfriends tits looked really good yet?
Know what's awesome? Flying a mini helicopter while you shit.
My stepdad and I just tag-team hit on a server at McDonald's. This is the man I should have grown up with.
My family will be here in an hour and I'm deciding between doing my makeup or saying fuck it and wearing what's left of last night's...
Damn why is there no horse blowjob emoji?
I was just the victim of a drive by judging in a horse and buggy.
The fuck? Where?
St. Mary's. Amish people. Too high for this.
It makes no sense at first, you go with it, it's fun and entertaining and then a disaster
So I'm never gonna get to see you again?
Hopefully.
Apparently I drunkenly told him I was going to ride him to the rodeo and break him like a bronco, then I stole his nachos and beer. Adulting is hard!!!
I do have a moral compass! I can’t help it if it only points at penises
Randomize