That would explain his violent outburst while watching barefoot contessa...
That's true. There's really no bad time to take a Vicodin.
It is the Reeses peanut butter cup of pharmaceuticals.
So we just left her at the hospital. She is not ruining my Monday night
Just got assigned a beer bong as hw in fluids to demonstrate the inverse of pascals principle. I love this prof
When you wake up, just ignore the mess in the bathroom. I'll take her home when I'm off work.
There was booze on his face and I wanted it. I'm not sorry.
I will be going to walgreens soon.. nothing says trainwreck like pickin up a scrip for xanax at 2am drunk..
Thanks to you and Ketel One I now have a court summons with the actual word "frolicking" on it.
My vagina is screaming your name . Wtf did you do to it
You know it was a weird night when you find curly fries in your purse the next morning...
just woke up on my patio with a mouse eating cheetos off mys chest. youre all assholes.
I don't care. She's the only girl to make me feel like my face is melting when she blows me.
Sooooooo Your wife and your girlfriend are making cat noises at one another via text
He said he wanted to lick the breadcrumbs off my chest
It was 3 am when she drunkenly tried to deep-fry a banana.
How'd she do that?
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