do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
I've decided that I only have enough money to either eat or drink over the next month. I'm sure you know what choice I've made.
so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
She answered the door wearing a blanket and holding a golf club. I was too late for this party.
apparently it's a turnoff if you ask a guy why he thinks he needs to use magnums
You'd think, but when you nail one sorority sister, you might as well have nailed them all.
i'm calling it my monica lewinsky shirt now. may it live forever in infamy.
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
Saw a dude last night at a strip club's bar eating canned pineapple and giving tootsie pops to the girls...
Who wants to play the "pick up your shit from our floor because you're not paying rent or dating either of us" game?
Everything is a learning experience. Last night we learned why I'm not allowed to bring guys home from the bar....
it was an ACCIDENT
it was a DICK
I would have wore underwear last night if I knew I had to change a tire this morning
Woke up this morning to him making out with me in his sleep, then I had to go on a scavenger hunt to find a used condom before my roommate got back... it was under my pillow.
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