i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
I swear to God, I saw my life flash between my legs.
gettin pulled by a cop with a camera crew. gonna flee. want my 15 min of fame on cops.
we got blazed and looked up peoples criminal records
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
Yeah we call her cincohandjabos because she gave 5 guys handjobs one night in 5th grade
Oh wow. Was walking and just saw her in the pool, fully clothed, ranting on an alligator float. I guess i should go get her before security gets here.
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
Apparently this is my life now. Fucking men in their 30s with small dogs.
My life has become one weird ass game. No one wins. No one loses. We all just kind of hang in limbo and hope we don't die. Eskimo sisters for life. Please have sex with one of them.
Now I'm ashamed that I wore a bra
I threw up in my brother's Easter basket
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
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