is your mom at the bar?
I feel like I just won at life, no connection sex and free 12 pack of beer after. Does life give out trophies, if so I want a big one.
i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
I think I'm going to try and hook up with that blond tonight.
I'm going for alcohol poisoning.
When you're on the hood of a car, 10 mph feels pretty fucking fast.
she's sitting alone using her breathalyzer as a kazoo. help.
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
White girls? They're everywhere. In packs. Drunk white girl packs.
Banged my ex-wife last night...so I belong to that club now.
The struggle bus crashed, rolled down a mountain, and went on fire, and I was on it ugh.
My hand smells like rave and peanut butter.
He will be so fat that the winter can not penetrate his blubber.
Starting this Monday as I always do
With a desperate plea for help
My parents get here at 6 so I have to make it look like a sober virgin lives in my room by 5.
i like beer, sex, and cooking. what more can he want?
Randomize