If a woman tells you she has been pink socked...don't move forward with her.
he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
I felt like a body pillow being humped by a twelve year old.
You asked my mom "who the fuck drives four hours to sleep in a guys bed and not touch his penis"
You told the waitress last night "What tip bracket do I have to be in to see your boobs"
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
It feels like my uterus is trying to crawl out of my ass wearing cleats. And yourself?
I don't mean to insult you, but did you leave your training bra in my bedroom last night?
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
Can't keep a straight face around her after she asked me to "make fuck to her."
He's hitting it raw. Might as well stick his dick in a vat of SARS at this point.
He'd rather cuddle with his shitty little miniature dog than the half naked girl in his bed. I've lost all hope for him and my vagina
A unicorn in pinstripe pants just got on the J at Dolores stop. It can only be a good night
he probably thinks i inited him over to have sex but really i just want to show him 90's music videos
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
Randomize