ppl dont tell me stories about anal. apparently im not a tell-me-stories-about-anal kind of person
her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
Yeah. I hotboxed a windbreaker.
I feel wrong giving my mom a cash gift full of dirty stripper money.
These shoes are way too nice for a walk of shame. Its how I keep myself in line.
Just found a pic on my phone of you on squatting on the hood of a police car about to take a dump. Care to explain what happened last night?
I blacked in at 6:30am on the last stop on the train with a random fedora on? And I'm pretty sure I rode in a limo last night while eating pizza
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
I punched some guy in the face for being an asshole then later I went to say sorry and give him a hug and he started making out with me. How was your new years?
I ate an entire popcorn ball before bed. I know that because there is popcorn stuck to my poncho. Also. I'm still drunk. Also. I made out with a 19 year old. Also. #barnparties
Thought about you all night last night, then I fucked the shit out of my boyfriend. Win win for me.
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
Just saw the cop you hooked up with over break. He’s def hotter in uniform.
Tell him to stop shaving his pubes. #Notmyjam
Drunk sex on a hardwood floor is never ever a good idea. Lesson learned.
I’m getting reeeeaaalll tired of telling cute boys I gave them chlamydia.
That’s two in three months. You really know how to live.
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