You can't special order awesome
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
We just did a shot to "getting laid in the bar bathroom". I love where this thursday is headed
It's 6 am, I'm drunk, and celebrating the end of finals.Go ahead and ask me where I am...if you guessed a McDonald's playpen then you are correct. Badabababa I'm loving it
Do you think next time you could control the yawn? Kind of a buzzkill to be mid-orgasm and see you yawning over there.
He kept telling me Te Amo last night. Over and over. And that he was scared. Drunkenly. In Spanish.
i cant believe we used adam and eve as a sexting theme last night
I'm serious-it was like trying to deep-throat a minivan.
my experiences serve only to benefit you young virgin
He sent me a dick pic. I am fighting the urge to send him a "sorry for your loss" card.
I called you last night? What did I say??
That you love me forever and that I'm the greatest in the world now mohammed ali is dead...
bitch dont make me pour hotsauce in your vagina
You could cut the tension with my nipples.
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
Randomize