had to check his id this morning to remember his name.... i was wayy off
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
He passed out drunk on top of me. Fully erect. Still inside me. Woke up like 1 minute later, and continued.
my co-worker, his best friend who also works with us, an my baby daddy, ive turned love triangle into a retarded shape with to many sides to pronounce
Lost gin update. Blackout me found and re-hid the bottle. Left a note to myself saying, "GOOD LUCK, SUCKER!"
There are drunk kids outside our building hugging that cop that's always on his bike as he's citing them for public drunkenness. It's not even 11 am.
Why is there a keg in our kitchen? I'm not complaining but why is there a keg in our kitchen?
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
Congratulations on your lack of fetus.
People don't tend to fuck with you when they think you have someone else's blood on your face
Well I woke up at my house so that's a plus. But I'm pretty sure I peed on my sofa because I woke up in the pee position.
My moms new boyfriend looks like Stu Pickles if he was in a biker gang. He gave me free coke though, so come party?
But really, someone with a penis give me attention before I start posting nudes on Instagram.
My neighbors are white girl rapping to Hamilton again...
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
Randomize
