The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
He told me he had more lines than a plaid shirt
You saying I have a drinkingg problem is like saying Superman has a flying problem.
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
We just got really drunk and bought toilet paper. Successful Monday.
Dude we need to petition the city about running buses later, none of my booty calls own cars
After skinny dipping in your pond, I think me and tequila have added a whole new dynamic to our relationship.
every facebook tagged picture of yours, you are either drinking, swimming or drunk in water
I honestly don't know if ill make it through the next two hours. The hangover is strong with this one.
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
They seemed upset when they walked out and saw a penis in a mouth
Hooker in the library. I repeat, we have a hooker in the library. This is not a drill.
This is even better than the wine from my laundry basket
Thanks for not letting me choke to death on my vomit last night
Thank you for attempting to organize my DVDs in chronological and alphbetical order
Passed out in someones front yard last night. Got woke u?p by a lady walking her dog at 6am. Rock bottom.
Randomize
