Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
you got thrown out for pissing in a cup in the corner. you told one guy it was okay because you went to college and that he wouldn't understand
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
what's with the bloody hand print on the hood of your car
Thank god for makeup because it looks like someone took a shit on my face
Of all the shitty people we associated with, you should be happy that I'm the one fucking your cousin. Sorry.
Well I tried to call you. I was convinced my body was made of wood. But the Xmas lights in my room helped
Walked back to my room from the bus last night and all I see is 3 of my friends on the porch chugging whiskey and then throwing up in unison
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
This is the fourth day in a row I've walked outside in the same pajamas. I think the neighbors have finally given up on judging me.
The last thing I remember is singing hotel California with a hobo and asking every bald man I saw if I could touch his head.
When we were done he got down next to the bed and I thought he was Tebowing. He was hitting a bong that he had already loaded and hidden under the bed.
This guy is selling weed on the train. Like... Straight up. No fucks given.
Timehop reminded me that 4 years ago today I helped a one armed man do the YMCA by being his other arm.
MY GUT IS TELLING ME YES AND SO IS MY VAGINA
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