Last night I had a dream we played Uno and had sex. You won at Uno, but you lost at sex.
Ikea night.
?
Insert tab A into swedish slot B
even after i explained my bobby knight costume the bartender still kicked me out for throwing the chair
the last thing i remember was trying to convince him to call over his girlfriend so we could have a threesome
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
You two were too busy to notice that his used condom landed on me when he threw it.. Thanks.
She said, "I don't really go out much, but my husband recently cheated on me" and I don't remember anything after that.
So when you said you wanted to make a clay replica of my boobs and hang it above your bed you actually meant it?
i wasn't going to tell her about the threesome but i had to explain the tree and the green paint everywhere
I'll see ya tonight at your house...and I'm bringing you a special treat that starts with a V and ends with us eventually going to rehab one day.
Note to self glow in the dark nail polish can be quite the mood killer during sex especially when you notice its working for the first time and you stop everything your doing to do spirit fingers
well. can officially check "get caught having sex on the front porch by the neighbors" off the bucket list.
I got high and had sex with reindeer antlers on. It was magical and animalistic. Tia the season.
You just missed an honest to god bukkake
if by making eggnog you mean drinking all the spiced rum, then yes, she's making eggnog
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