I think drunk me is telling hungover me something... I just have to crack the code.
Olympics start in one day, that gives us 24hrs to think of gold medal worthy drinking games
As we walked into his room, he said welcome to the hurt locker. I should have left, but I love that movie.
You've been drinking wine and eating bacon all afternoon. HOW IS THAT DOING GOOD?!?!
Dude.. full face helmets and hangovers do not mix... I am never going to get rid of the smell of puke.
I think we should go through the tsa checkpoint with raging hardons when we go through LAX. I think we should pass out some viagra to everyone
Oh my god I forgot there were Band-Aids on my nipples
WHY does every guy I sleep with want to fix my car?!
Selling our snow shovel to buy more beer. Not your brightest idea.
If you hear a sad honk in the wind it is me.
I woke up sandwiched between them, all of us naked, and they were just sharing a cigarette, a donut, and the paper like it was just some normal post-threesome Sunday brunch.
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
I've got your keys and your panties. You can have one back. Your play honeybuns.
Nothing quite like the "I had sex you a month ago and now we're stopped at the same 4 way" wave
Just once I'd like to go out and not have to tell you to put your pants back on.
Randomize