I want 2 things right now, you or a cig
cig
Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
i just got yelled at for having sex. this sorority thing is worst than being at home. at least at home they think im still a virgin
In fairness it was pretty good sex, but I still wasn't expecting the mass cheering and applause he got on leaving my tent
I'm expecting you to come by soon and a magical night of sex and floating on clouds to follow.
I got really high and googled the history of Amish people for like an hour.
How high are you?
I feel like breakfast can just fly into my mouth
If I showed up at your door with pizza and a bottle of tequila wearing nothing but chaps and a fireman helmet, would you send me away?
WHY THE FUCK IS MY BATH TUB FILLED WITH MUD?!
1. You were drunk 2. You wanted a mud bath\n3. We tried to talk you out of it, but you kept throwing dirt at us
Your friend gave me you're number. I was the guy locked behind the book shelf.
I think you have the wrong number, but I hope you escaped your library-prison?
I don't want to resort to having sex with people that actually like me.
I am praying to every god I can that he drank so much that he won't even remember me
It's barely past noon, how am I already talking about double penetration
Randomize
