I just said that Oprah is crazy and like 5 fat white girls jumped down my throat. I sat back and smiled.
Someone carved 'Hank' in all caps in the snow outside my apartment building so naturally I turned the capital H into a K and added an S to the front.
I think college has really matured you.
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
I understand why they say don't drink the water in Mexico... I just saw 5 guys piss upstream of where the bar tender went to get the water
We are both federal employees and Obama gave us a four-day weekend to lie in bed. Do you know how many orgasms that will be? I knew there was a reason I voted for this guy.
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
I woke up this morning with a tampon in my nose and food EVERYWHERE...
Before we have sex for the first time I would like "eye of the tiger" to be playing to mentally prepare me for what I'm about to endure.
COME HERE AND I WILL SUCK YOUR COCK UNDER THE LIGHT OF THIS BEAUTIFUL ELECTRICITY
I wish my nipples were as well behaved as yours.
I'm really just disappointed in myself for having sex with a musical theater major
I'm done, I have no more memes or ways to ask for nudes, so yeah
WEED BROWNIES! He put weed in my brownie mix! And he got it from YYYYOOOOUUUU!
Look at the bright side mom. After 20 years dad is still capable of surprising you!
Shut up Max.
She made me undress her with my teeth...explains the button in my shit this morning...
Soo I'm in the trunk of a car drunk about to jump on trampolines. My life rocks!
Randomize