Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
I told her at least we still had each other. That's when she started crying.
The worst part is I think my tongue cut his penis and now he wont talk to me.
I just watched a woman break three wood planks with her boobs. I don't know how I feel about that
I like the one of me you and her but you're looking at me...Total foreshadowing right there. I'm cropping it
So we have also come to the conclusion that slam piece Saturday's are the appropriate follow ups to find a husband Fridays
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
I'm starting to think you fell asleep on your kitchen floor pantless with salsa spilt around you
This is going to ruin my future wedding planner career, but isn't it better the groom knows he's gay BEFORE he gets married?
I'm starting a point system. For every 2 beer runs i do for u slackers i get a free bottle of Barefoot.
Honestly I'm so excited to go to bed I feel as if I don't deserve to be in my early twenties.
I swear to go if the response she sends me something along the lines of who the fuck is Mark Hamill I might need to brake up with her.
At least you didn't get an invite in the mail to your fuck buddy's baby shower like I just did. My life is a sitcom
I've amended my previous statement: I'm not allowed to put in my two weeks till I ask out the waitress. Now I have motivation on two levels
Randomize
