"tonights gonna be a goodnight" was blasting at the club while i was screaming "NO ITS NOT" and crying. How do you think it went?
By the grace of god and the ingenuity of Alexander Graham Bell, this text message is made possibe: YOU ARE A WHORE
I just watched my mom open a wine bottle with an electric drill. I have never been so proud.
That was the most comfortable bag of doritos I have ever slept on!
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
I have bruises everywhere. I think I took "the drinks are strong" as more of a challenge than a warning.
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
How am I feeling this morning? Well, besides the fact that my vagina looks like a pair of giraffe's lips and I'm walking like an over-confident cowgirl, I'm fantastic. Thanks for your concern.
Honestly I'm so excited to go to bed I feel as if I don't deserve to be in my early twenties.
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
It's six am and her daughter just walked in on her mom and roomful of naked people playing strip spoons. glad Im apart of that childhood memory....
I asked her how many times she came and she said "Oh god I can't count that high, Rutgers doesn't teach us that."
I grabbed the pretzel bag with my toes last night. I think that day of yoga had paid off.
Seriously though, I walked in and he was holding my cat in the air singing "the circle of life"...
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