my mom walked in on my vaccuming.......i wasnt vaccumming
It's hipsters with their motorcycle cop mustaches, moccasins, douchey irony, and department stores to supply their independent conformity
Something's gotta give!
yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
I knew the sex would be bad when he slipped the rubber on and said "safe sex activated"
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
just woke up on my balcony. who won the super bowl?
I always knew I'd be the first one with an STD
He blacked out at the first bar and passed out at the second...we just carried him to bar three and four and sat him in the lounge chairs, he said we're amazing
What? My family got wasted on patron and I threw up on my pants and said it was gravy. Hot mess.
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
Sorry, fell into some ass. Call you tomorrow.
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
I woke up naked and only wearing cowboy boots, wrapped in a curtain that was still attached to the pole
Just woke up. Will be over soon. DON'T LEAVE THE CHAMPAGNE UNSUPERVISED.
condom fairy costume came in handy...we were making out in my living room and he wanted it so i took a condom off the costume and we did it right there...with my tutu still on....
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