You thought cars couldnt see you if you stuck your head in the mail box
smell my finger.
why is it whenever you puke in the park there are always little kids on the swings?
I don't know how many crown and cokes he went through but I know it was more that I have fingers. We are never leaving Texas.
they arrested me when i was peaking, i'm pretty sure they were specifically looking for me but i was too busy rolling around, loving the grass to notice the police car..
Do you remember calling yourself Captain Cockblock and openly giving out everyones sexual history? Because you did.
There is a visibable outline from you in the grass. its you in the fetal position...
I think I sprained my soul last night
I'm assuming the reason my elbow is so sore has something to do with all the broken shot glasses eh?
Yep
If I was home I'd be ouija boarding the fuck out of the house, haven't been this high since that day
I THINK it was the lead singer. Whoever he was, I have his number and his dick was pierced.
It was totally the lead singer.
if it wasn’t 100% before, it is now that i will most definitely die a quesadilla related death
I was lying I actually don't, I hope a reindeer shitted in her bed
I'm gonna have to start putting baby wipes and a change of pants in my bag. The amount of times I'm scared of shitting my pants in public is too high and I need the reassurance
My brain is a dvd screensaver and I'm allowed to have a good thought when it hits the corner
Randomize
