His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
one day john is going to snap and they are going to make a new show called "john and chainsaw minus 9"
i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
So what does a sober person do in Vegas on a Friday night?
i do some of my deepest thinking on my wednesday morning walks of shame
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
Drunk cheerio confetti may seem like a brilliant idea when your drunk, but believe me, the next day, its a horrible, horrible mess.
She kept grabbing my head and told my faces to stop shaking.. Also, she kept whispering something about seeing flowers in my eyes.
So I was thinking for Halloween I'd do Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde....for my vagina.
I think the 8 yr old is hitting on me and they just prayed for the salvation of third world countries
Did you take the full box of samoas or do I not remember getting baked and eating half a box by myself?
99% of the contents of my handbag are ketchup packets and condoms. I feel that says a lot about me as a person.
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
My roommate wasn't home and I was too drunk and tired so I peed in the trash can. Twice.
Decisions were made. The quality of them will be judged tomorrow
Randomize