If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
Give me a heads up the next time you BBM me a voicenote of you cumming so I'll make sure not to play it while in the car with my parents. Miss you too.
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
walmarts paint section shouldnt be open at 3am
Dude, didn't you know? Its balls out wednesday.
Just tell your mom you have to go somewhere half naked with a strange man. She'll understand
my vagina hasn't met your boyfriend yet ... makes me sad
Did you seduce any young men into coming home to your love nest of poutine and jäger bombs?
Trying to find a card for this engagement party. Can't find one that says "you met each other 5 months ago, cant wait to get the popcorn out and watch this one fall apart"
I would of joined had I not blacked out last night and ran around naked breaking things till 4 am
I left myself a note saying 'buy a hamster but not an orange one like this pen'
omg so drunk
The awkward moment when a lady ask you what kind of lipliner you're using, but really I have just finished eating hot cheetos.
I woke up and found my apartment really clean, appearantly drunk me couldn't tolerate living there anymore and left sober me a lot of insulting post-its...
I passed out in your bed last night...there maybe a snickers and twix bar under your pillow
So do I get points for screwing my recently single ex boyfriend and then telling him to go fight for his ex back?
Randomize
