your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
awesome recipe for disaster- bar hopping at the airport
I just put a tampon in while driving. Don't tell me I don't got skills.
we agreed that it was acceptable to get the cat high as long as we gave her a lot of food.
Shit, I may have left some acid in your bathroom last night. Has he been in there lately.
You are the only one who would stop a bum, tell him to open up, then pour straight vodka in his mouth. You made his year.
i don't even know why we got arrested this time. i think the cops just like our company at this point
You just said you hate yourself then sent me a picture of your friend's penis. Clearly this is a night of honesty.
Please call us Steph is okay but missing phone wallet tooth
New rule: if you don't think racism exists, you don't get to put your penis inside me.
All because of that GODDAMNED MIKE PENCE.
After all this I still can't spell gonorrhoea without autocorrect
on the bright side i found your panties and the lid to the nutella
Randomize
