You are a beautiful, beautiful young lady. Your heart is made of tissue, blood and love. I will call you very soon, Princess Sophia.
Someone should've told Pope jumper lady and terrorist pants guy that the Worst of 2009 lists already went out....
We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
My own mom unfriended me on Facebook.
I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
i have my graded calc test (94%) sitting on my empty case of beer next to my desk. this is me winning at college.
Apparently, I kept going on about how i'm going to name my first born Ramen. I think this is a good parenting move.
Turned on my GPS and all that it said in the search bar was "beer,"
Yes, I have your ice luge mold. I'll do a prisoner exchange for the beer bong
Yeah. It's just like I have his virginity and he has my shoes and where do we go from here.
well he never texted me back and the pizza I took my rage out didn't deserve such malice
The bump on my forehead, i think, was from falling asleep at front door, on my knees, slumped over. But we played good music so what?
I'm glad you don't care about kids. That's one of your better qualities.
I PUT IT IN THE UNIVERSE THAT I WANTED TO STAB HIM AND THEN SOMEONE DID! KARMA IS A BITCH AND SHE IS BEAUTIFUL!
I'm crying during the second episode of Golden Girls that's how high I am.
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