Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
You probably shouldn't be hiding under someones bed listening to them get head
Maybe if you date her you can take a dump on her
This house was built for laser tag.
I went to the bathroom like 8 times and each time I looked in the mirror and tried saying "I am sober." I burst out laughing when I got to "so-" every time. If you can't convince yourself, you can't convince anyone else. Fuck it, I'm going upstairs and drinking more.
You make your fellow Jews happy.
I was more traumatized by the table collapsing while i was going down on you.
the igloo is complete. bring your weed and the hat with the floppy ears
Im embracing the luau theme and maybe bringing a kiddie pool filled with alcohol. Im also embracing the high probability I will not remember this night.
The only way to make beer can wizard staffs any better is to sew your own wizards robe and hat to go along with it. welcome to tuesday nights at my new apartment
Kristy just reminded me that I have a bottle of champagne to lick off your ass hole...... This is by way of saying that we have plans on Friday.
Jesus these cramps...it's like every potential fetus I swallowed last night is personally punching me in the uterus
I always thought The Big Bang Theory wasa terrible show but that was before it came with blowjobs and pizza.
she used her teeth again, but this time it was out of love
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
Alternately I could tell him western classical is just a series of events that had to happen for music to reach the point where Beyoncé was able to pen drunk in love, which is the pinnacle of humanity's artistic achievement thus far
Randomize
