no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
'fingered' and 'feelings' NEVER belong in the same sentence.
You can't just send the picture of my vagina back to me, 2 months after we broke up, and make small talk out of it.
His dick is longer than my foot and I'm a size 9. I'm literally kicking myself in the vagina
I like the odds of his and my children being professional athletes too. To support me in my old age, see I do think about the future.
Dude you chased a girl around the yard and then fell over the curb. Face first. You got up on your own tho so you reached champion status
I just woke up on an unfamiliar floor, my shoes are gone, my suits covered in red lipstick and chocolate, and Im wearing sunglasses that say "Maid of Honor".God damnit I love this country.
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
My philosophy is thug life and that means never having to say your sorry for stealing drinks off tables
Waffles and pussy, what else is there?
I'm over here willing to be the Yoda of fucking but I guess he just doesn't want to be a Jedi.
You'll love it there. Trust me. Cheap tequila, pretentious beer, tall white guys who will treat you badly. Its got everything you like.
I was so high last night I honestly think my tears were medicinal
He keeps singing a song about someone called the dayman.
....fighter of the Nightman?
You’ve seen my tits of course he broke his wedding vows
Randomize
