Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
This threesome is so guaranteed that dinner feels like a charade
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
Theres two guys using a blow up doll to hold their beers while they float around the pool
Im on my way, tell them to get ready for a high-five
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
I puked in the urinal of a bar tonight. Not embarrassed cause I got away with it, legitimately upset you weren't there to make fun of me.
he pulled a $400 bottle of champagne out of the back part of his toiled and I was ready to blow him then and there
I hate waking up Sunday morning and thinks "how many friends did I lose last night".... Normally it's between 1-5.
I'm just gonna yell "SURPRISE ME" and see what happens. No way this could go wrong
haha it's ok, I asked people. I was like "I'm high and lost" and the dude just said "That's my life. Love it."
It's gotten to the point that when I close my eyes to cum all I see is candy crush
I'm wine drunk & this is not good news for anybody
Don't be upset because I bitch slapped you with intelligence
Dude you came into the room last night soak and wet and told me you just took a shit in the shower
Randomize
