I hope God doesn't listen to everybody on a Saturday night.
Found a phone last night. Hope "daddy" gets picture messages
She fell onto my light and broke all four plants. I don't care how good the blowjob was.
i ran around the party telling everyone that my favorite sexual position was also the only position that made me queef...i kept calling it the "double edged sword"
Ok, honestly? Periods can't be THAT bad, have you ever tried to shave a ball sack?!
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
She told me she gets scared easily and that I had to protect her. Then I made a condom joke that ended up making her cry... All bad dude
You know this who 'I show my love by being a total dick' thing is getting old, right?
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
Hey I was just wondering if you could go look for my teeth?
I just sent a snapchat of my boobs for Adderall. It's finals season.
should we try and roll a cross joint since its good friday? you know, for jesus
I was not drunk. There was Star Wars, sex, and baby oil.
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
I cannot believe I accepted his penis into my body.
Randomize