Take xtc, wait 20 minutes and then take a shower. Trust me.
I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
Yeah. My legs are trembling...hard to walk. Feels like a neon arrow is pointing at me saying "just had sex (with not his wife)"
Come see our sink grown plant.
he started fingering my stomach rolls instead of my vag... am i really that fat?
so. which one of us is going to pay for the neighbors new window? it cracked when i threw the bottle at it but smashed when you threw yours.
You were trying to swim on the floor while eating a hot-dog bun and laughing about how much you hate bread and didn't understand why you were eating it..
I'm drinking wine alone, eating leftovers, and cleaning my sex toys. For the love of god, do not graduate.
I'm gonna have sex with my clothes on and I'll know everyone there so I'll be in my comfort zone
I heard moaning and ass slapping and sponge bob.
For future reference.... When you take a beer out of a 6pack... You don't insert your phone as a substitute.
I feel very compelled to cut off the person's ears that is sitting in front of me
Just threw up in the shower. Hangovers at 23 are the best.
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
Wine through a straw in a subway cup.....classy
Randomize