im pretty sure i tried to attack the vending machine last night
lol who won
well im in the hospital right now so u tell me
sometimes I tug on my anal hairs for pleasure
you've officially gone too far. we are no longer friends
I just called a child with a Yankees jersey a jerkoff. so much for a friendly day @ the ballpark
So we sucessfully lit our bathtub on fire. Thought you should know.
Hulk Hogan has now convinced 2 women to marry him & I have yet to have a successful or healthy relationship. I am officially depressed.
You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
Aren't you glad we're at the point in our relationship where I don't even ask why you're hiding in the cabinet?
Idk what else to talk about besides you paying for half of my vaginaplasty.
Nope she woke up in a hotel room alone on 55th street. A guy in a lamborgini gave her a ride this morning. She was walking barefoot home
You're fucking beautiful as shit and we should have loving sex...
Well I can't message him and be like "hey I was behind you in CVS a month ago and I remembered your last name and DOB and looked you up on fb and added you so wanna hang out"
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
We need a shit load of segways right now
He said I have a comfortable vagina. What does that even mean?
She puked off the side of the cruise ship onto a newlyweds balcony table and they watched it all happen then they made her clean it up
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