what was i supposed to do!? wake up and actually ask her name??
I saw a chick at 8 am this morning walking back to my dorm wearing wings... I'm kind of jealous.
I'm pretty sure there's seven mailboxes in the bathtub...
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
There is a keg full of gin. THERE SHOULD NEVER EVER BE A KEG FULL OF GIN.
And the cops told us we were all naked.
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
she had that "i just got used" look on her face when i kicked her out at 5am
All I wanted was a "this is what America feels like" blowjob before I left. Is that too much to ask for?
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
you might as well be a hobo. you were covered in pee last night hanging out on the stairs drunk.
right. well we all have our lows.
Thanks for taking care of me. I hope I didn't pee in your car.
Dude just texted me asking if I could drive 45 mins for a quickie dude use your hand
You were crying in a drunken stupor for an hour because "the new daft punk album didn't blow your tits off"
The man sent me a video of him doing the helicopter, the least I can do is go visit him in the hospital
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