Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
He said he wanted to have kids with me so they could grow up to be professional linebackers. Not. A. Complient.
Guy having heart attack in McDonalds. Classic.
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
The highlight of my night was definitely explaining the bandaid on my nipple.
Just saw 1 guy dressed as a cow and another dressed as a shrimp dancing on the side of the road. We're turning around I NEED to dance with them.
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
You forgot your "boyfriend" from last night on my couch. You're suppose to bring that shit with you.
Two shots of gin says this is gonna be a sloppy lab write up.
But that background check said 51...Omg. If I hooked up with someone that's my dads age.....
I have alcoholic tendencies but you know what? College
The alcohol tastes like we did a beer run at the nail salon
After this week, alcohol is mandatory.
I walked into your room and you were wearing party beads, a foam finger, and reading the dictionary. Good night?
You showed up at 4 am holding a beer and wearing a wig you apparently found in the dumpster.
That explains some things...
Randomize
