I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
very cute, but more "I wanna put you in my pocket and keep you as a pet" and less "please bang me" type of cute.
He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
Im drinking a beer thats called vuuve which is boobs in begian. I think my life is complete.
he referred to my room as the tit cave...
There's a hand-carved wooden bong in my backpack, and i really wish i could remember last night now.
I love how our sober spotter means you only have to stay sober enough to type your pin in an ATM
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
I couldn't help thinking that my sock monkey was judging me
and then I drunkenly screamed, "you can ride that Uber all the way to revenge city!"
which was funny until I realized I paid for my enemy's cab to go fuck my ex
He took me home and by the time I woke up after catching up on sleep I realized I accidentally put on one of his fiances socks. whoops.
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
he told me he didn't like my name so he was going to call me Casey instead
Our house drank 90 beers yesterday afternoon before 8pm so add that to the list
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
Randomize
