Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
Note to self. Never fart in a tanning bed
You can call me Bill Clinton. I brought 2 good looking Asians home last night.
love makes seman taste better
Just gave my little brother the collection of clothes that boys have left in my room since I've been in college for his birthday.
If I knew losing weight would mean this many fucking creepers I would've just stayed fat.
someone left their shoes, a resume, and a pizza in the shower... i am actually speechless
THERE ARE SO MANY GREAT DICKS IN THE WORLD. HOW DID I NOT DISCOVER THIS SOONER!?
You should get a handy in the street again, just to prove you've still got it.
Apparently I told his new girlfriend to stop swallowing because she's getting fat. Oh, and I yelled this across a large room
He bought you footie pajamas. Shit's pretty serious.
I didn't think I was even that high but when we were standing in the cop car's headlights I totally forgot how to use my arms
His favorite stripper is going to jail. He's taking it pretty hard
He was fingering me and I came so hard that I actually broke his wrist. We're at the ER now.
Want to come over and dangle your tits on top of me like a skewer?
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