i just spent the last half hour thinking about my totally irrational and intense hatred of wedge flip flops.
Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
I just witnessed Grandma making her infamous daiquiris. Extraordinary.
Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
Hes still mad that I left the room mid-hookup to go get a pickle from the fridge.
All I remember is you introducing yourself to the entire basketball team using the line "I'll show you a slam dunk."
She Kept going around and squirting jello shots into guys mouths. That was her ice breaker.
Should have told me the night we were talking about deal breakers that vomming outside your car was one of them. I would have taken a cab back
It's four o'clock and my 60yo aunt's tits have already made an appearance and there is a dildo traveling around the room periodically assaulting family members. Strangely I am thankful.
But seriously he was like a god with his hands. My vagina feels annointed.
It's like some sort of initiation to finger one of them... so I did it. And got high fived afterwards like a dozen times.
Those were right hand only?
Someone wrote "gnarballz" on my fridge in black marker. I'm pissed, but more concerned I slept with the one who did it
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
dude, i just accidentally flashed your mom. BIG TIME.
Randomize
