He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
i just drank a strangers drink off a toilet
I'm not to broken up about it. Our relationship was worse than a coldplay song.
basically theres shrimp everywhere. splattered on the walls, in the carpet, its bad. ohh theyre never gonna get the smell out.
Yes, I did know where her mouth had been, but frankly I think it was a lesson you needed to learn.
Apparently suggesting that she was the kind of girl who might be expected to kill someone's pets hurt her feelings...
I have already decided that it happened in an alternate universe since both of the people involved don't remember it and we only have the word of a sober person that it happened at all
That would warm my breasts.
In this context breast is a metaphor for soul.
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
You can't just leave with hair like that
I was blacked out when we met, so basically this will be a blind date.
I slapped a guy during sex last night because he moaned the wrong name. Then I remembered I gave him a fake name. Sorry bro.
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
Im drunk taking pregnancy tests with this really hot girl...i dont know what is happening
It’s like a sexy version of those choose your own adventure books from when we were kids. No matter what you choose, there will be penis!
Randomize
