I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
I want to make a porn site called "girls with daddy issues"
mom just found 19 empty wine bottles in my closet. i hate spring cleaning
Just got Netflix. Dexter Marathon. Still in my PJ's. Only eaten cookie dough and drinking a 40. I have never reeked so strongly of lonely .
I mean how do you tell a nurse in the ER that you dislocated your knee giving a blowjob to your boyfriend.
Very innocently.
I will not be a drunk bitch. I will not be a drunk bitch. Chanting this until it's second nature.
Drinking in moderation can be fun. Drinking in moderation can be fun. Chanting this until it becomes true.
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
there was 'chicken suit porn' in my search history.......also 'scuba diving porn'
I just threw up all of my lunch in the Barnes & Nobles parking lot. Rockbottom tastes like a veggie burger, in case you were wondering.
Do you think it's wrong for me to hop on that dick before he realizes that he's gay?
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
I cant believe you made me read bad furry sexts
Update: I spent 10 minutes trying to fish out a rogue vagina weight.
She just took all of the blankets in the house and threw them in the yard, because 'the grass was cold'..
i just went to hell in the tanning bed. i think god is giving me a preview of what is in store if i keep getting drunk everyday.
Randomize
