Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
She ordered a salad and a budweiser. I love her.
Dude let's go to Saudi Arabia. They outlawed valentine's day. And probably love.
My life has literally become a dickpocolypse. Thank you, summer, I missed you.
what if his mom answers? its like high school, but hes 30
You're just mad because I look hotter in my mug shot than you do in yours
i thought i should point out that whatever else you can say about me, i've still gotten high with a midget.
The problem with having a roommate is that you are forced to answer the age old question "Are you okay?"
He lit a candle for the mood and ended up lighting my hair on fire while we were hooking up...moodkiller
jusy threw up in the airport bathroom. I am no longer thankful for fireball.
Of course i made out w him. He was painted green. You know of my secret longing for the Hulk.
Moral of the story - don't craft naked. Your nipples with thank me.
I swear I get as excited about the sound of a condom wrapper as my cat gets when she's getting a can of food.
I had nothing but condoms at the checkout, then grabbed a pack of Orbitz gum and said "gotta protect from bad breath" felt like a boss
He tried to throw up into a beer bottle. It was a complete disaster. Vomit went everywhere. It put the Bellagio's fountain to shame.
Randomize
