thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
i make out with random ppl when i drink he shouldnt feel special
wait can you just look around please? that was my favorite bra and i've already asked like 3 other guys
you know you made it when your beer pong table is made from imported italian hardwood
thinking back, the fact that our bartender was missing a finger shouldve been hint number one not to let him pick our drinks
They made out. Sounded like hippos drinking water
watched two friends get underages. one had a shirt on that said lets get wasted while the other said to the cop "i understand your just trying to do your job but that was dirty bro".
But you can still look for dick after you find Jesus.
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
tell me you did not just describe yourself as "hot and bothered"
I am so sorry for drunk texting you r kelly lyrics
Showing girls my stab wound was not the brilliant idea I thought it was.
Maybe why that's why I'm perpetually single... I can't find a guy with bigger balls than mine.
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
I wet willied a stranger last night didn’t I?
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