in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
69 is so not fun when his penis is sporting a 70s hairstyle
Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.
I just woke up at my desk with "To Whommmmmmmmm" typed on a letter. I have no memory of waking up, getting dressed or driving in.
How fortunate humanity is that it need not rely on the female orgasm for procreation
My complete lack of self respect has really improved my blow job technique
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
can't blv i tried using a "backpack" as a unit of measurement...i drank a lot of beer last night
You asked me if you had to go downstairs to get upstairs. And then you forgot where you were.
His dick is hereby named Charles Dickens. Will's is less cerebral. I'd like to call it Pinnacle like the vodka we drank when we hooked up, but I feel like that's a compliment it doesn't deserve.
My dick can't jump between your dick and her mouth, man. It's impossible, I think.
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
Who suggested the eggnog wet t-shirt contest last night like whose idea was that
Speaking
That's so awful of me. Instead of comforting her I masturbated in front of my ex-boyfriend.
I’m looking forward to our Cougar years. These freshmen know how to fuck
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