He has such a weird drunk-voice.
dude, he's deaf.
he's chasing his jose cuervo with hot tub water
IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
You going to midnight mass? we need a dd
You didn't want to have sex last night because you said your grandpa just died and you didn't want him watching..
It's been 5 months since I last wore a condom.
Not including when spray tanning
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
He ate me out like a beaver on a tree. I've never been so scared in my life
Also-when I die, I want it to be with my arms above my head so that when rigor mortis sets in, my breasts are perky.
I think I blacked out after I decided drinking alone on the trailered jetskis was a good idea
I'm almost too old to be on The Real World but feel like I'm too young to be on The Bachelor and I'm just really confused with my place in life.
I may be a complete scumbag but even im not willing to spend a grand and sit on a plane for 24 hours just for shrooms and a blowjob
They told him he could only pay in monopoly money and he pulls out a wad of it from his pocket... i think im in love
I’m going to Lewinsky this place
That makes no sense, but it sounds terrifying
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