Well all I remember is going to sleep being big spoon to you and waking up being little spoon to *****
why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
Just took career test that listed librarian and bartender as top career choices. Fascinating.
Oh i know my limit. 9 shots after i've given blood.
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
drunkie insisted on stuffing the rest of his scrambled eggs in his pockets before we left ihop. we really should have left a better tip
apparently he thought telling me 'the weasel wants to come out to play' would somehow convince me to go down on him
I want to bury your face in my vagina. Possibly by force. I will try not to suffocate you though.
I WILL MAKE A FLYING LEAP FOR YOUR DICK WHEN I SEE YOU THROUGH THE WINDOW
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
Of course I understand. Thou shalt never turn down a free meal or drink. It's one of the commandments of being a girl.
I have the relationship skills of Miley Cyrus and I could've said this was a bad idea
We are trying to penis chicken awkward them out. But I think it's a gay wedding. Backfiring. Heavily.
why did you kick open the doors at church screaming whos ready to party?
Randomize