im on my way to getting "i just graduated college with no money, no job, and no plan" drunk
these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
now he is talking to a potato
Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
I just lost $50 at the races, got drunk, and woke up to my ex-gf. Apparently the good decisions kept on rolling...
They were done having sex when I went to the room. They had that look on their faces.
Disappointment?
I have seen more male genitalia at this party tonight than I ever want to see again in my entire life.
There's always the 'not have sex with the drunk girl I just met at some party' option.
That was the plan but Tequila showed up at the party too.
For future reference "bring our litter sisters on our date day" is not such a good idea
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
That works. I won't care. I'll be a mermaid. Mermaids don't give a fuck.
Especially drunk mermaids.
We were in the middle of a serious discussion about social justice and he pulled sequins out of his teeth and kept talking like nothing had happened.
I woke up and found my apartment really clean, appearantly drunk me couldn't tolerate living there anymore and left sober me a lot of insulting post-its...
Your the only girl I know that carries a $1100 purse with tater tots inside
If I end up in the hospital remind me to order jimmy johns.
Why?
They deliver.
Do you think it would be weird to wear a shirt that says 'big fun small package' from an ex for a first date?
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