my ass hurt today after the party last night. I wnt to the doctors and they found a coin in a ziplock bag with a note from you. WHAT THE FUCK DID U DO TO ME???
so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
We tried to play doctor all sexually then he was taking down my 'symptoms' I said I needed to puke he thought it was part of the game
Its Friday night, and I'm sitting at home watching are you smarter then a 5th grader, drinking vodka. I got every single question wrong. Clearly you see where I'm headed in life.
I know i should have focused more on what you were saying in the text rather than the fact you spelt "suicidal" wrong
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
Won't anyone wonder why I'm mute, bald, and wearing an eye patch?
Before I roll over explain to me why you're naked and on my floor.
I'm hoping my engineering degree will pay off when I invent porn watching in the shower
I'm gonna go ahead and say I love our drinking habits but anytime we roundhouse a 750 of Schnapps on the way to a non competitive bowling league we might have problems
I just want the relationship Bob and Linda Belcher have- is that too much to ask?!
My head is bruised from having sex in the backseat of an explorer last night.
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