Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
It's hipsters with their motorcycle cop mustaches, moccasins, douchey irony, and department stores to supply their independent conformity
Something's gotta give!
I have sucked so much dick this week I think I am going to start sweating semen
Fuck. These are the symptoms I had when I was pregnant. This could be bad.
Pretty sure I tied my shoes laces together to keep myself from driving drunk. Fell like six times. Keep forgetting
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
well that explains the french fry and ketchup packet rolled into the wasitband of my sweats. thank you drunk me.
omg just made cake vodka jello shots, sooooo excited
dear god these taste like death. death and sprinkles
Dude. I am seriously trying SO hard not to be amused by Honey Boo Boo. But the fact is, she just got a mani pedi with her gay uncle Poodle, and he got a discount because he only has nine toes, and I am ALL IN.
No she left bc the of pic I have of my mom in my bathroom. She thought it was my gf
Why the hell do you have a picture of YOUR MOM in your bathroom?!?!
Awkward sister question: which game of thrones female left would you fuck?
A guy in a gorilla mask got blown on the lawn. And then the night got weird.
Just remember, it's never too late to make a porno
I was asked to be part of a mmf threesome. I think I'd rather stay home, watching Orange is the New Black and cuddle with my cat though
I'm cuddly bitch. Deal with it.
Randomize
