new number. flushed my phone last night when i puked, made B help me look for it for 2 hours.
I think I should have my paycheck direct deposited to the bar
Watching that soccer game was like getting kicked in the crotch for an hour and half and then coming right at the end.
Dude. She told me she felt bad for not giving me more blojobs. HOW COULD THAT HAVE GONE BETTER?
Bartending School is so much more enjoyable now that I realized I was in rehab at this time last year.
I slept face down in the dirt because I wanted to go camping?
He's had mdma poured down his throat. He's getting huggy.
Texas State Troopers call you ma'am even when they arrest you for public nudity and after you've puked on their cruiser. Country boys raised right.
To drink from my fkask next to a cop car or to not drink from my flask next to a cop car
The last thing I remember is him yelling from across the room "WE FINISHED THE HANDLE!"
It was 11pm.
Opened my notebook to coke all over the pages. So, if that's any indication on how this weekend went.
Just because I stayed up all night betting on Australian Horse Racing doesn't mean I have a gambling program.
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
where are my eyebrows?
I'm hung over and my mom made me go to church. I feel like such a sinner.
I need an aspirin and some dignity.
Randomize
